Telling the kids and parents

It has been two weeks since the diagnosis and what a whirl wind the past two weeks have been!  I have gone through so many emotions.  I have cried, I have laughed, I am angry, I am determined to fight and win!  I'm touched and humbled by the outreach and support of family, friends, and colleagues.  We are truly blessed to be surrounded by so many incredible people.    

Just as I thought... things are getting easier with the kids getting older and a bit more self sufficient, life got a lot harder! Carter, who recently turned 6, is wrapping up his kindergarten year and is looking forward to the summer months.  Katherine recently turned 4 and started Pre-K.  She's loving life as one of the bigger kids at school.  We were so looking forward to the summer months but this summer will surely be the one I want to forget!

We made the decision to share the diagnosis with the kids.  Carter had already started picking up on something being different as he was questioning why I have been going to the doctor so often.  We wanted to address his concerns sooner rather than later.  Before speaking to the kids, we reached out to their teachers and parents of close school friends to share the news and our plan.  I felt incredibly guilty for potentially introducing the word cancer into the children's vocabulary at such a young age.

We were honest and transparent with them about what was going on.  We told them I have cancer and avoided the use of the word sick.  We felt the word sick is so broad and they may associate it with something that's contagious and that they may catch.  We told them "Our bodies are made up of cells and that these cells do a lot of different, really great things in our bodies.  Some of the cells in mommy's body just forgot their job and are doing things that they aren't suppose to be doing and the doctor's are going to help mommy get better."  Carter was visibly upset and attached himself to my side.  He asked questions about how I was feeling, how long it will take for me to get better, etc.  Katherine knew something was wrong and said she was sad. My heart breaks for them but know because of them, I will fight that much harder.

We shared the news with our parents.  Mike waited until we had a treatment plan in place before sharing the news with his parents. It took a bit of coordination with my siblings to share the news with my parents. We wanted to do it in person and ensure to them that I would be ok.  It was especially hard to tell my parents as they lived through this journey with my younger sister, My, roughly 7 years ago.  Because of language barriers, it was hard to articulate to them that what I have is not quite the same as what my sister had.  My is a BRA2 carrier.  I am not a BRA2 carrier.  My mom kept holding onto hope that what I discovered was benign.  My dad was upset and sad.  It will not be an easy journey but I am determined to fight and win this battle.  I have to!