Serendipity

The second round of chemo will start this week and I'm once again restless. So many thoughts are lurking in my head that I can't quite shut down. I often wonder if I'm clinically cancer free, is this next round of chemo and radiation necessary? What is the chemo targeting? I'm mostly scared as I will be receiving treatment of new more toxic drugs at a new hospital with new nurses. The only familiar face will be my medical oncologist. I decided I to follow Dr. Comander to her new practice at NWH.

As much as I have tried to beat the planner out of me, I'm a mom and a planner!  The unknown of how I'll feel at this next go has me freaked out. I'm mostly scared that I'll be so sick that I can't care for the kids. I'm holding onto hope that somehow someway I will make it through the next 8 weeks as quickly as the first 12 weeks.

It has been 4 weeks since my surgery. I'm pretty much back to my ole self with the exception of limited range to my left arm, where the lymph nodes where removed. I have been doing strengthening exercises and have made progress. It unfortunately isn't quite there yet and therefore haven't received the clearance to drive. I am hoping the arm improves without OT. I have enough doctor's appointments that I don't need more.

The kids helping me with strengthening arm exercises. Katherine gets excited when she's able to reach as far up on the wall as me. Carter is the time keeper.  I'm smiling here because the right arm is a breeze!

I'm incredibly thankful for my parents during this whole ordeal, especially during the past 4 weeks while I'm recovering. They have been so incredible with making sure the fridge is full, we have prepared meals, the house is tidy and helping with the kids. Mom and dad, we hope you realize how much we appreciate you and your selflessness! From the bottom of our hearts, THANK YOU!

My last chemo treatment was August 18th. It will be roughly 2 months since I will receive treatment on October 13th. The past 2 months flew! I love that I'm feeling normal and like me again (well maybe not the chest area! I'm still getting use to these things they call boobs!) I continue to be amazed with the hair regrowth. It has come back and I kinda like it! Maybe I'll rock the pixie haircut for awhile after my hair grows out and stays (haha...not like it's a choice but I will have to for awhile until the hair grows back).  I will be sad to see if go again in a few days but know it will return again soon enough.

I have been so overwhelmed with all the medical bills. We decided back in July to explore Mike's insurance.  My policy carried a steep co-payment at every doctor's visit of $90 since it's a tiered system. Mike's was more reasonable at $25 across the board. My policy also had a large deductible for labs, scans, etc., which Mike's did not.  We carried both insurances for a bit just to make sure.  We finally dropped my insurance and thought Mike's policy was better.  Unfortunately we received a recent bill for a whopping 6k for the surgery.  In the whole scheme of things, this is a very small percentage of the actual bill but came as a surprise since we didn't anticipate it.  Mike's policy has what is referred to as coinsurance and we are responsible for this portion first along with the deductible.  I was prepared for the deductible, I wasn't familiar with the coinsurance.  Just prior to this bill, I just got through squaring away lab and scan bills from my old policy of 1k.  As much as all this sucks, I'm trying to focus on the positive that soon enough, I'll have my health back and can work to pay it off. I feel very fortunate but often feel overwhelmed during these quiet times.

Shifting gears to something a bit more joyful.  This past weekend...something a bit serendipitous happened. We went to The Local in Wayland with some friends. We have never been to this restaurant prior or really ventured to Wayland. As we parked, we noticed a car reverse. I assumed the car was trying to pull into the spot next to us. To our surprise, it was nurse Ann from MGH!! She saw us and reversed to say hi! I was so happy to see her as I didn't get to see her on my last day of treatment. We caught up quickly and I finally had the courage to ask her for her contact. I didn't ever really have the chance or did I think it was appropriate while I was receiving treatment.  It truly was meant to be because Ann said she's never area there either and just happened to be there today. Thanks Ann for stopping to say hi!! You are stuck with me. 😉