#8 down--2/3 way there...WOOHOOO!!

I often forget I'm 'sick' or am battling cancer. Other than the hair loss, I feel and look the same or at least I think I do! Treatment days, to be expected, are a tad tougher than the rest of the week, especially on longer infusion days. I have been fortunate enough to bounce back fairly quickly after treatment sessions but the energy fades as the week progresses.  

For the most part, I feel as a family, we are living our lives as close to normal as possible.  I'm working when I can. The kids are at school or camp.  We have action packed weekend plans filled with get togethers with family and friends, birthday parties, sport activities, etc.  I know this will not always be the case but for this phase of treatment, I'm so happy and grateful that it hasn't disrupted our lives all that much and we have adapted.

This past weekend, we took the kids to Six Flags and they got to spend the day with their cousins and friends.  The kids had a blast!

This week for the first time, I had moments when I felt sick or am reminded to slow down more often than usual.  I took Katherine to the dentist on Monday.  It was also Carter's first time going to a new camp where he is taking the bus three towns over.  It was a hectic morning so I skipped breakfast and took my daily medicine without food.  I generally always try to take medicine with food.  While at the dentist office, I felt incredibly sick.   I felt like I needed to throw up so I excused myself while we were waiting for the receptionist to check us out. Unfortunately I didn't made it into the bathroom and projectile vomited on the floor!  😕  Katherine was so confused and asked me why I was spitting up. I felt incredibly embarrassed but I didn't see this coming.  Luckily since I had not consumed anything but water, the mess wasn't that bad. Have to always find the positive in things! 😊 This is one of the thing I'm learning about cancer is sometime things sneak up on you.  I don't know what's coming around the corner.  From this experience, I've learned to have my brother, JD's trusty yack pack close by in situations like these!  😊  JD had sent to me a supply after I threw up when I had my port installed.

At work, I do not break for lunch often but enjoy running errands occasionally, if I can.  It helps break up the day, gets me out walking and I'm able to some fresh air. This past week, I ran out to Wegman's.  Such adventures would normally take 30 mins.  The adventure this week took me closer to an hour and all I managed to pick up were a handful of things.  I quickly learned that things simply just take longer.  I can't walk as fast to the car.  I occasionally have to pause to catch my breath and sit for a few mins in the car before driving.  The hallways lights in the corridor of the office also seem to bother me in addition to random smells.  I'm super sensitive or so it seems to everything! The best way to describe my symptoms is that it reminds me of being pregnant minus the belly and the joys of feeling kicks.

Since our vacation, it has been a nice break between treatments but we are back on track.  I had my #8 treatment today with Nurse Phil.  Woohoo...I'm 2/3 done with this treatment plan!!  I hadn't been assigned to him prior but always thought he was great since I've seen him before interacting with other patients.  He was very nice and took the time to explain things.  Mike and I were talking to Nova, the social worker.  She had popped in to see how we were doing.  I told her about Carter's struggles with my hair loss still.  Last time we talked to Nova, she gave us a video to watch and share with the kids on hair loss during cancer. We have attempted to show the kids but Carter was not interested in seeing it. As we were talking to Nova, Phil came back in and said he was going to prep my premeds and that we can continue to talk.  I reminded him that I'm super sensitive to medicine.  He assured me he reviewed my files and would proceed slowly like nurse Ann.  I trusted him and said okay. As I was talking to Nova, he was setting up and told me what he was doing.  I was only partially paying attention and and all of a sudden, I felt this huge rush and started coughing.  I was in a haze and wasn't feeling well.  I then realized he had pushed the Benedryl via IV instead of slow dripping the medicine.  Luckily this time, I wasn't shaking but felt the chills.  Mike was on his computer working and didn't realize it either until after the fact.  I generally have this tickle in my throat and cough quite a bit when I'm administered Benedryl via the IV.  I started coughing and he knew something wasn't right and looked up.  Phil too realized something was not right as my speech got slower and I was coughing to catch my breath. I was in a fog!  I slowly told Phil that I assumed he would slow drip the Benedryl and not push the medicine based on prior experiences. He apologized profusely and said he will update the order form and for the remainder of my treatments as that was not specified in my record.  It was a very sleepy treatment.  I did manage to get some shut eye.  I'm sure Mike appreciate that, although I did boss him around to fine me a snack before falling asleep.  😜

It amazes me how the drug is administer affects how I feel.  I guess that's how it should be but again a new revelation because up to this point, I haven't taken or given so many medications.  Speaking of revelations...as we were checking in for the appointment, I asked Mike what the back of my head looked with a baseball hat.  He said I looked like a cancer patient!  I didn't believe him and asked him to take a pic.  Not sure why but I have this illusion that my hair is somewhat full. Unfortunately when he took the pic, I could not believe it!  It was the first time I felt like I just really need to cut it all off. I did not want to look like a cancer patient and much rather be bald than look like what I was seeing!  I have been holding on for Carter.  I decided it was time to rip off the bandaid and cut off what hair I had left.  Mike did the honor a little while before we went to pick up the kids at camp and school.  I was really worried about how the kids would react but they were great!  I waited until we got home to take off my baseball hat.  They didn't seem to notice immediately.  Katherine commented first and said she liked my new haircut!  Carter said I looked different and didn't say much other than saying he didn't want people to make fun of me.  He has been so exhausted from camp.  I can see the wheels spinning in his head as he's processing.  I know he'll come around and I'm so happy their reactions were so great!  We will use clippers this weekend to clean up the new do but here are some pics.